The Lady of Pain: Faction Opinions

Faction Opinions

What the Factioneers Believe (or Say they Believe)
by Bartomiej Walczak

Anonymous member of Revolutionary League

"The Lady creates portals as she wishes and uses them to put us where she wants us to be. We're only pawns in her grand scheme of things, berk. All we are is just pawns. And it's time to do something about it..."

Factor Alia the Sentimental of the Sign of One

"Ah! You come to me, addle-cove, with such a lust for the dark. Why I imagine such tests for myself I will never know. The dark of the Lady of Pain is that she is nothing but my conscience. Should I cease to think of her she will be gone. However, that would affect the balance within my mind and so I choose not to stop thinking of her. Yes, she is my conscience and therefore indirectly, also that of Sigil's. Should I fall prey to my conscience then it, and not I, will be the centre of the multiverse and I shall cease to be. That is why death comes to those who worship their conscience. I will not cease thinking up my conscience, but you, on the other hand..."

Factotum Gorveld the Requester of the Fated

"She had the potential to be the One; the One who could have taken the multiverse. But she fell in love (to whom is lost in memory) and was too weak to take the final task. Too weak to consume her mate in one last, final swoop that would enable her to hold the multiverse! Sure, no-one said it would be easy, but after that their purpose was lost. They parted, and that destroyed them. He broke down and decayed. His energy was ripped from his body and thrown into the 'verse as both positive and negative. His body was rent asunder and separated, each part being placed as the Inner Planes.

"She watched this and wept. Her tears froze in the void and formed Crystal Spheres that formed the basis for the Primes. Their hopes, dreams and fears were manifested separately as powers in the Outer Planes and the gods that grew from them. They had achieved so much, worked so hard, but lost it in the final hour. She became bitter and lost all. She diminished in both size and power, and in a final fit of rage she shut herself off from what remains of her true love and the lives they led, and formed Sigil as her cage. There is no kindness in her, nor compassion. She kills any who think her great. She is the vision of what a berk becomes if they lose their way and become weak. You have the power but you have got to work at it berk!"

Factor Pordai Silkblossom of the Sensates

"Ah, you beautiful leatherhead, how your brow furrows when you ask that question. You ask me what of the Lady of Pain? How your voice betrays your respect of her with your inflection on the word pain, glorious. She is the one who has had the secrets of the multiverse made clear to her. She has savoured every minute, tasted every blade of grass, touched every atom. She seeks but one more clarification before moving on, she must smell the scents of countless worlds. It is for this reason that she has created this gateway. With it, she forces all of those smells through one small place. Hence you see her as you do, always concentrating, never speaking for all other things are known and a waste of time, she must concentrate on the work at hand. We are only fortunate that she shares this with us without having to savour the blinds just yet! Now if that helps move you towards bloodhood then come here and let me taste you!"

Master of the Heart Kilopp the Ready of the Transcendent Order

"What? You leatherheaded bubber, what are you thinking for? You should be honing your actions so you don't need to think! Put this idle thought aside. No wait better yet I'll give you the dark of it and help you along a step so you don't sound like a Guvner. The Lady of Pain doesn't think. She's the embodiment of one who acts: try praying to her and see how long she thinks before acting! Go and practice, she was just a member of our faction who's almost got the total dark of it."

NazDoR of the Xaositects

"tHe laDy oF pain iS. aroUnd loOk! wHen cOmes noOne she knOws! Knows nOone coMes sHe wheRe! embodiment Chaos Of is She tHe. Upon gAze of pain lAdy. Appreciate randomness the Her oF. dark she has Chaos of.

"The of Sigil randomness the lady pain oF cauSed. Centre oF lady is Chaos the the. You mUst EnerGy part of become. But energy Remember lady is the. Chaos cross die and. Pray to to lady the order causes. order such must die!"

Wilan of Greyhawk City, Clueless of the Highest Order

"Hey isn't she that babe in the Tavern Of The Lonely Star that could eat a live hedgehog?"

Factor Xashion of the Athar

"Na! The dark of it is that she's a mortal just like you. All the mumbo-jumbo that she is a god blah blah blah. That's all just clueless talk. What she does anybody can do; you just got to know the dark of how to do it. Let her carry on. If you make her mad she's powerful enough to put you in the dead book or show you the blinds. Besides she's not hurting anyone and with her close there's more chance of finding out one of her little secrets. Now if only I could get the dark on her little secrets..."

Preacher Jhuldi M'gnorr of the Believers of the Source

"She is one of the few who have returned from beyond to test us. If we stray from the path then she sends us back to be reincarnated a step backwards. Any who pray to her deserve such a lesson for it shows they are not ready to ascend. She has reached the greater glory and has returned to help us all get there quicker. You must just figure out what test you have been given. Ignore her, for that is all our tests. An old saying is apt for the test she represents: "Curiosity killed the cranium rat!"

Futilar, Denier Major of the Bleak Cabal

"Do you think you know who you are? Naaah, didn't think so! She doesn't know who she is either so how the hell should I know, berk? There's no higher meaning to the Lady of Pain. She just is. She does a good job of cutting short those that seek the truth. Making you a barmy in the mazes is the best way out for some of the addle-coves round here. Don't look for answers son, there ain't any."

Hof the Crumbling of the Doomguard

"Don't you see the dark of the Lady? Why she is here to make sure that the long term plans of the universe come to fruition: wind down. Why the hell do you think she built this place? The powers were looking for immortality. Control the multiverse and you control the entropy. Control the entropy and this place will last to infinity and beyond. That ain't right! The Lady of Pain shoved Sigil in here at the central flux and presto, no power can pass, therefore no-one can control the multiverse and eventually it will all come tumbling down. To know the dark of anything berk, you've just got to look a lot further into the past and future!"

Last Gasp, a Dustman Factor

"Do you think anyone like her could be alive? Come on now, berk! Next time she walks by, see what positive feelings she exudes! Yeah right: life is supposed to be a celebration! When last did she kick her knickers off?

"She's dead, just like the rest of us. The only difference is that she's busy climbing the ladder of truth near the top. That is why you only see her so rarely. She's nearly totally dead, only whispering in here on her way to the next rung. Ever think why anyone who prays to her 'dies'? They rush it. Make a connection with true death and hey presto they've got to do it all again, the berks!"

Davis the Quill, Field Aide of the Fraternity of Order

"Now there is a woman who has Power. She knows the laws of the Outer Planes and has manipulated them to suit her. Any threat to her and she tweaks a law and, bang, no problem. We believe that she is seldom seen as she attempts to get the dark on the Inner Planes' laws under her thumb. Once she has done that she'll control the Multiverse. But that ain't easy. See, anybody can overtake her on her quest so she built this place, a city of gateways. Now she can restrict where you go and hence what you can find out but there are back doors and loopholes. Knowledge is power. Now please forgive me I've just remembered something..."

Jingo, 'Recruiter' for the Free League

"What do you think she is bubber? Don't cuff yourself to my beliefs go out and figure out for yourself or have you lost the ability to free think?"

Orb Seven, a Beholder Enforcer of the Mercykillers

"The Lady was trapped by the other Powers after she tried to overthrow them. She was too powerful to slay and throw into the Astral Plane (or maybe they tried that and she returned) so they imprisoned her instead. Of course, she turned this to her advantage by making her prison the most easily accessible place in the Planes. Sly trick, that. She deserve a better punishment, I'd say..."

An Anarchist only known by the Rainbow Mask (s)he Sports

"That tart's corruption personified. Anyone who controls this much has to be corrupt! A cutter's got to know when to keep quite and when to speak and maybe I've spoken too much already but I'll tell you this: When we tear down all of this she'll be the first pin to fall. To us she's the leader of the last revolution! After tearing it all down and rebuilding, she faltered. They say power corrupts, now this babe had infinite power. Just before rebuilding she was weak and became corrupt at the crucial time. She built the planes to suit her needs and ways, to shackle the elements and separate the astral from the ethereal. They should be allowed to run free. She will be toppled! Viva the new revolution!"

Juston the Symphonic, Harmonium Mover Three

"That's simple berk. She's here to make sure you toe the line! Get it leatherhead? So if I see you asking anyone else I'll empty your bonebox for you! Once we're all like her life will be real peachy. What do you say to that?"

Popular Conspiracy Theory of the Dispossessed, a Pandemonian Sect

"Many years ago the 15 most powerful factions banded together and agreed on not annihilating each other, and concentrating on getting rid of the rest, so that those 15 would be even more powerful. They invented the Lady of Pain (or perhaps the Signers were convinced she existed) to scare away potential rival factions."

Palzari, Unique amongst Signers in that she Claims not to be the Centre of the Multiverse

"The Lady feeds on the energy of the entire multiverse. After all, the Outlands are the centre, right? And the Spire's in the centre of the Outlands, right? And the Cage is at the very point of the Spire, right? There you go. And that means that she's way too powerful for anyone to fight. Makes you wonder if she's trapped in the Cage, or if she's keeping others out."

The Theory behind many an Anarchist Scheme against the Guvners

"What about Factol Hashkar? It's said that he's a petitioner who worships the Lady - thus he ended up in Sigil. If that's true, maybe the proxies of the Lady are actually petitioners of Sigil, drawn there because of their devotion to the city. This would mean that Hashkar is one of the Lady's proxies (and he's influential enough in Sigil to fit the bill). Just because he's her proxy doesn't necessarily mean he gets his instructions directly from her. Perhaps, given his devotion to Sigil, he doesn't need instructions to do the Lady's bidding."

Fi'Pill, a Confused Godsman Student

"It seems the Lady of Pain doesn't want to be worshipped, as she doesn't want to become a Power. That's why she flays anyone who prays to her. The thing I don't get is that if she ain't a deity, then why doesn't she want to become one?"

Eblis, a Tiefling Factotum of the Bleakers

"Oh sure, I know what the Lady is - so does everyone else. That's why we're all here, see? Everyone ends up in the Cage sooner or later. Some get slung in the Mazes - that's what happens when you make trouble: Solitary confinement instead of normal imprisonment. What's that? Why are we here? What's why got to do with anything? Stop looking at me!"

Anarchist Cell, formulating a new Strategy

"What if some 'enlightened' cult of the Lady of Pain grew up on a Prime world? She wouldn't (or couldn't) travel there and flay them. She might even become a power if enough bloods worshipped her. Just imagine; you travel to this distant Prime Plane for some reason and find a city very much like Sigil - not the Torus shape, but one with the same streets, buildings, etc. But here, people actually Worship the Lady of Pain. The factions'd be very interested to learn about this place - the Godsmen would be ecstatic, the Athar would be irritated, and the Harmonium would just want to shut the berks up! What a beautiful chance for insurrection!"

Eblis, a Tiefling Factotum of the Bleakers, speaking from his retreat in Bedlam

"Why have I decided to tell you a again? You just don't get it, do you? THERE'S NO SUCH WORD AS WHY! How come? I guess I changed my mind... YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT? I got a new idea, see, and if those leatherheads in charge find out, I'm done for...

"That's why I'm here, where even the Hardheads don't go!

"There. Is. No. Lady.

"How come? I ain't seen her. Ain't anyone else alive who's seen her, and I've been all over the Cage. I should know... I'll tell you the rest. Follow me... Hey, didn't we just pass that building a few seconds ago...?"

J'hed the Dreamer, Signer

"Who's the lady? Simple. The Lady's the one who's dreaming up all this. Who else would it be? Think it over, berk. Us Signers are just her version of herselves.So, of course that means we're the true factions. The others, the Lady just makes up to test us."

Oax of the Xaositects

"The Chaos Lady Is. All are trapped. All are free. Do di do. Seen a butterfly recently? Powers eat cheese. Rules chaos all."

Kamien, a romantic Sensate

"The Lady is that which cannot be sensed. It is she who keeps us from understanding the Multiverse for she has no smell. No sound. No touch. No taste. Nothing. To understand her, and therefore the Multiverse, we too must become nothing. That's what happens to petitioners who make it. Of course, the Lady don't want too many berks finding out the truth, that's why she don't let berks who die in Sigil become petitioners.

"Of course, this only works if you sensed all that you could in life. If not, you're reborn, kind of like the Godsmen say. My sole purpose is to one day feel her with all my soul..."

Joto, an Anarchist

"The Lady? She's just like every one of them damned powers or factols, she is a goddamn... what? What the.....AAAARGHHH...."

Glumfish, Cipher merchant and Secret Worshipper of Aoskar

"My theory is that The Lady is the keeper to the portal of Ultimate Truth and that is why the Factions are in Sigil: To figure out what the key to that portal might be. They'd better be peery about it, though, for as the great book says: 'But beware all yea who search for the Truth and fail, for to be cursed to become a Spire Butterfly is a cruel fate indeed.'"

Kirra the Marked, Indep Rumourmonger, speaks of the Lady to Horuk, a known gossip

"I figure she's playing the factions off against each other, like some barmy board game. Once a body becomes a Factol, he secretly becomes influenced by her, and she's able to manoeuvre him. Sigil was created to be her game board. See, that's where folks like the Indeps and Anarchists have given her the laugh, cause they don't have a Factol. Why do you think all those Indeps got lost after the Great Upheaval? Wasn't any addle-coved disease...

"Thing is, who's she playing against? Games are no fun by yourself. Hey, don't go rattling your bonebox about this. I don't want to get in a maze."

Viner the Aasimon Philosopher of the Athar

"The Lady is an avatar of the Great Unknown, that's why she's surrounded by the mystery of the beginnings of Multiverse"

Excerpt from The Mechanus Book of Law, Volume 74, Page 1,935, Chapter LXVII, Section 18, Clause 38b

"It is prohibited to speak of the Lady of Pain in the 7th hour of the 15th turn of the 5th Gear of Regulus. First offence is punishable by a fine of 50 gold pieces, unless the offender is humanoid, in which case it is punishable by loss of the tongue, or they are a modron, in which case it is punishable by a demotion. Second offence is punishable by death."

Ithian, a Cipher

"The Lady of Pain just is."